King Donald the Last

Most of the objections to and outrage at the Trump administration can be understood in light of the concept of America, a concept that Trump and his people reject.

Briefly, the U.S. Constitution embodies a set of ideas about what kind of country the founders envisioned. Largely in reaction to Europe’s history of monarchies, and to England’s King George III in particular, the U.S. was to be, as Lincoln later described it, a country “of the people, by the people and for the people.”

The Declaration of Independence actually lists the reasons early colonists threw off the rule of England, and they all had to do with inalienable human rights, government by “consent of the governed,” and the right of the people to choose a government that will see to their “Safety and Happiness.”

This whole American concept, that government serves the people and not the other way around, was a radical departure from the thousands of years of human history that preceded it. The whole world sat up and took notice. This, above all, is what made America great.

But the Trump crew completely reject this concept. They are secretive, self-serving, and utterly inaccessible to ordinary citizens. Trump regards himself as an absolute monarch … utterly infallible and above the law. He acknowledges no obligations to his supporters, his colleagues in government, the Constitution or tradition. He is King Donald.

Many Republicans want to turn back the clock to a time before FDR. Trump wants it back to before George Washington.

Fortunately, many Americans still remember and cherish the American concept. Many still long for real liberty and justice, and not mere words in an incoherent speech. This is why so many people have been chanting at their representatives, “You work for us!” And many government officials, perhaps even some Republicans, actually comprehend their duty to the people and the law.

May the reign of King Donald be as short as it has been disastrous.

The Lord of the Things

Three branches of government with each other vie.
Seven articles of Constitution, which rarely get read.
Nine supreme justices on the Court so high.
One orange lord (who’s a closet red)
In the land of D.C., where politicians lie.

One ass to rule them all, One ass to screw them.
And those whom he fooled deserve what’s coming to them,
In the land of D.C., where politicians lie.

Going Backwards

Executive orders protecting our borders
Are really not likely to work
As it’s known through the land
That the pen’s in the hand
Of an orange-faced wispy-haired jerk

Another big goal, to revitalize coal,
Will go bust with its dust and pollution.
Energy companies can already foresee
There are cleaner and better solutions.

Republicans don’t serve the public and
They are beholden to the one percent.
This constituency donates generously
To their campaigns the millions they’ve spent.

They rob from the poor so the rich can have more
Leaving nothing for food, schools or health.
So let’s not pretend they have any agenda
But redistribution of wealth.

Let Them Have It

Sometimes I think Trump opponents should drop the resistance. Just stop. Let them have it. Let Trump and the GOP have it. They already own the entire government and, by extension, the country.

When 2018 and 2020 come around, they’ll have no one but themselves to blame. They won’t be able to point the finger at protesters, or obstructionist legislators, or even the media.

If we let them have it, they’ll surely tank themselves.

But then I think … when the GOP sells off mineral and land rights to government land, we’ll never get that back.

When we build pipelines through precious land, we’ll never get that back.

When mining companies dump waste into rivers and streams, we’re not getting those back.

When we lose out on hopeful immigrants who look to the U.S. as a haven of liberty, we’ll never get them back.

When we unleash bigotry and hatred, thus losing our decency as a people, we’ll never get that back.

When we antagonize some of our most trusted allies, we’re never … well, we might get them back, but we’ll have to grovel.

And when the U.S. becomes a laughing stock around the world, completely losing its leadership position and its role as the foremost example of democracy at work … that’s never coming back.

But most of all, while social safety net programs might be reinstated in saner times, the people who, through no fault of their own, depend on these for healthcare and sustenance, may be lost forever.

Bleats, shoots and lies

Breaking: White House leaks Trump court pick

The National Ditty

Irving Berlin’s timeless God Bless America sounds like a plea for divine favor, but the British national anthem, God Save the Queen, practically begs for help. Given the current political climate, we thought it might be appropriate to ratchet up the desperation of our own national ditty. So, we present …

God Save America

God save America.
We’ve plainly failed.
Our new leader
Is a tweeter
Who’s insane like a train that’s derailed.
With the terror, global crises,
And the economic slump,
God save America
From Donald Trump.

Breaking News: Liberal Scientists Delay Trump Inauguration

Breaking News

SCIENCE: More Things Suck Than Not

Scientists at the joint NASA/NSA/NAS/SNA/ANS research project revealed that in November, we crossed a tipping point at which more things suck than not. Their findings, to be published this month in the JOURNAL OF VICISSITUDINAL OUTCOMES, reflect the convergence of several independent indicators, including voter turnout, consumer confidence, cultural climate, opioid use, plate tectonics, maximum absorbancy, recommended daily allowance, mortgage interest rates, average life expectancy and chocolate consumption. These factors, which are generally regarded as notoriously difficult to correlate, provide a disturbing picture of the general suckiness of things, the scientists said.

The scientists applied a variety of sophisticated information visualization algorithms derived from work done for the U.S. Department of Homeland Security. Using these techniques, the research team were able to produce computer graphics, many in 3D, showing sharply declining trends and downward spirals. The scatter plot, in particular, shows a widespread range of data samples with no compensating pattern or arrangement.

Scientists were unable to comment on whether this trend was likely to continue or to reverse itself, but expressed confidence that they would continue to mine the data as thoroughly as possible.

Tenth Anniversary

Ten years and nearly a thousand posts in, this blog has drifted a little from what I originally envisioned, but not a lot. I expected to be ranting mostly about our blind acceptance of any new technology, regardless of how safe or beneficial. I particularly wanted to mock the cavalier attitudes about developing and releasing new technologies that could pose serious threats, such as those described in this article: Biggest Spike in Traffic Deaths in 50 Years? Blame Apps. That would have made me a Tech(nology) Curmudgeon.

However, our unquestioning embrace of technology turned out to be a useful metaphor for everything I like to rail against, making me a Tech(nologically-equipped) Curmudgeon. Either way, it’s been a fun an interesting decade.

Lately, I’ve cut down on posting, due to competing attention demands, self-directed cynicism, personal health issues, and some vague limitations that could collectively be called writer’s block. Luckily, the election of the most ill-suited person ever to be President of the United States seems to have at least partially rekindled the original fire. So if I manage to keep this thing going, you can thank Donald Trump.

Hamilton: 1, Pence: 0

Said the “Hamilton” cast to Mike Pence,
“We’re a diverse group in every sense,”
Exercising free speech
To appeal, not to preach.
But that criminal president, Trump, took offense.

You see, Trump’s little scheme was not flawed.
As if free speech had just been outlawed,
He acts vengeful and bitter,
Takes attention with Twitter
Off of Trump University’s fraud.

Ballad Box

A guy on Facebook tried to tell me Hillary is crooked.

I told him that the FBI and Congress  had both looked

And neither could find evidence on which she could be tried.

Says he, "That only goes to prove how thoroughly she lied."

I said, "She had an email server at her residence,

The FBI examined it and found no evidence

That any of the emails there would constitute a crime."

The guy said, quite disdainfully, "Wait. Just give them time."

"Through multiple investigations of Benghazi's raid,

The embassy's security could well have used more aid

But that was cut," I protested, "by your own GOP.

"Nevertheless," the man said, "the blame lies with Hillary."

I soon grew tired of going 'round in this political waltz.

The guy's answer to everything was "Hillary is false.

Don't you see the string of crimes she casually denies?

The proof of guilt is in the way she spews out all those lies!"

"So in your view, she must be guilty if she won't confess?

But if there's been no crime, maybe it's really truthfulness."

The guy replied "Well, can it be you're really such a chump?

The only one who tells the truth ... he said so ... 's Donald Trump."

Boo!

Ok, Trump Supporters ...

We get it! You’re angry with “the system.” Government is completely corrupt and needs to be taken down and replaced. But please take a moment to think about a couple of things.

First, you know that Hillary Clinton is evil. You know she lied about her emails, and failed to stop the terrorists in Benghazi. Above all, you know the mainstream media have a liberal bias and are all just lying to benefit her and to blame Trump. So most people are not getting the truth.

But how do you know all this? If the mainstream media are all liars, where are you getting your information? Web sites? Facebook posts? Trump speeches? Isn’t it possible … bear with me here … isn’t it just possible that your information sources, the ones that really know how evil Hillary is, are biased too? Isn’t there at least a tiny chance that whatever information sources you’re using are not perfect angels? That they may be trying to make Hillary look bad?

Also, while Trump says he’s the champion of the little guy … the one who’s going to help the middle classes … isn’t it possible that he is lying? After all, he’s a rich (maybe billionaire-rich) guy from New York. We have no experience with him in any kind of public life, so we really don’t know what he’s going to do.

And if you’re a Bernie supporter who’s just voting for Trump to spite Hillary and the Democratic party? Well, that’s just fucking stupid.

A Plea

If you’re a Hillary supporter, I’ve got nothing to say to you.

If you’re a Trump supporter, I have even less for you.

I want to talk to the others … the undecideds, the disaffected Bernie-philes, even the Gary Johnson-ites and the Jill Stein-likers. I’m not just going to say the usual crap about how your vote matters. It matters more than most.

I don’t need to tell you this is a very weird election year. It’s the Reality TV election. We don’t just want our candidate to win. We want the opponent to be voted off the island. To be fired.

Because, let’s face it, this country has become more polarized than it’s been at any time since the last Presidential election. We don’t simply favor one set of policies over another. Ha! How laughably quaint.

No, we’re convinced that only our candidate is even fit for office. We steadfastly cling to the belief that anyone but our candidate would destroy the country and plunge the world into war. Of course, that’s only true of one of the candidates.

Voters rarely base their decisions on the issues. Ordinary Americans can not be expected to weigh the kinds of complex trade-offs between helping families and children versus expelling 11 million immigrants and building a wall to keep them from coming back.

Instead, we like to vote on personality. Each candidate is really a character we’ve come to know, and we love them or hate them based on their roles.

Jill Stein, for example, is the self-righteous better-than-thou environmentalist. “What? You threw out that coffee cup?”

Gary Johnson is the happy-go-lucky doofus. Barney Fife on drugs.

Hillary is the Energizer Bunny. Or maybe Lucy, trying to keep up with the conveyor belt of lies and fabrications about her.

And Trump, of course, is Ralph Kramden. Fred Flintstone. All the bellowing and tantrums, but none of the charm.

So vote for the cartoon character of your choice, but vote!

The Incredible Trump

'PUBLICAN

BERN:
How does a snot-nosed red head, son of a Fred and a
Scotswoman, dropped in the middle of a
Not rotten spot in Jamaica, Queens, a family of means
Privilege and class
Grow up to be a narcissistic dumbass?

ROMNEY
Fred, son of German immigrants, collecting rents
From the Jews, thought the news
Of his German ancestry
Might not agree with their views
So he claimed to be from Sweden
And the tenants acceded.

PRIEBUS
And each day, the kid broke rules, was a real trouble maker.
Went to military school to be a mover and a shaker.
Studied real estate at Wharton, became a consummate faker.
Missed the Vietnam War, though he’s certainly no Quaker.

HILLARY
Put some dough in a show ‘cause he thought it’d be fun.
It flopped so he dropped it. Joined Liz Trump and Son.
Plenty of real estate that he had to run.
Learned the art of the deal, when all’s said and done.

BERN
Well, the word got around, they said “This guy is insane, man”
No one believed he had a serious campaign plan
Flying around in an unregistered plane, man.
Giving himself a bad name. What’s your name, man?

’PUBLICAN
Donald Trump, Republican
My name is Donald Trump, Republican
And there’s a million things I haven’t done
But just you wait, it’ll be great…

Spotlights

A Fake's Progress

If you’re a fan of “Star Wars,” you’ve probably noticed that every planet in the galaxy, whether desert, lush or frozen (the only options in the Lucas universe), seems to have at least one place where travelers of all species can hang out and drink. Whether it’s the Cantina on Tatooine or Maz Kanata’s tavern on Takodana, anyone with something resembling a butt and something resembling a mouth is able to sit and imbibe with other special effects in relative peace.

This indicates a very advanced civilization, because in actual human history, every time members of one race, group or tribe encounter members of another, the result is always hostility, violence and subjugation. Every time.

But historically, we keep expanding the scope of us in our us vs them struggles. First it was families or klans. Then tribes and villages. City states. Nation states. All leading up to the world wars, pitting alliances against each other. There’s a clear trend toward taking an increasingly broader view of our cultural identity.

Likewise, we’ve gone from believing the universe revolves around us, literally, to seeing ourselves as part of an ecosystem, one of many, in which many organisms and natural forces help to keep the balance that sustains our … and other … lives.

So there is such a thing as human progress. There is a right side of history.

And Trump isn’t on it.