Friday, August 16, 2013


The game of MONOPOLY, beloved of millions and part of our cultural heritage, has grown somewhat dated over the years. It recalls an Atlantic City of the days before gambling, Donald Trump and Hurricane Sandy. While this quaint pastime appeals to our sense of nostalgia, its primitive rules are too simplistic for today’s sophisticated gamer. We therefore propose these few modifications.


The object of the game is to become the wealthiest player in the game, through whatever means necessary.


The equipment consists of a board, 2 dice, tokens, 32 houses and 12 Hotels. There are 16 Chance and 16 Community Chest cards, 28 Title Deed card (one for each property), and play money.


Place the board on a table and put the Chance and Community Chest cards face down on their allotted spaces on the board. Each player chooses one token to represent them while traveling around the board. Players take turns rolling the dice and receiving a starting amount of $1000.00 times the amount shown, in any denominations they choose.


Select as Banker a player who will also make a good Auctioneer. A Banker who plays in the game should feel free to commingle bank funds and their personal funds at any time.


Besides the Bank’s money, the Bank holds the Title Deeds, and the houses and hotels prior to purchase by the players. The Bank pays salaries and bonuses. It sells and auctions properties and hands out the proper Title Deed cards when purchased by a player, it also sells houses and hotels to the players and loans money when required on mortgages. The Bank also sells collateralized debt obligations and credit default swaps.

The Bank collects all taxes, fines, loans and interest, and the price of all properties which it sells and auctions. The Bank is “too big to fail.” If the Bank runs out of money, the Banker may confiscate money from other players at the Banker's sole discretion.


Players take turns throwing the dice and moving their tokens the number of spaces indicated by the dice. Depending on the space your token reaches, you may be obliged to pay rent, pay taxes, draw a Chance or Community Chest card, Go To Jail, or etc…


Each time a player’s token lands on or passes over GO, whether by throwing the dice or drawing a card, the Banker pays that player a salary determined by the player’s token as follows:

TokenSalary paid when token passes go
Top Hat$1000.00
Race Car$500.00
Iron, Wheelbarrow, Thimble$50.00


When you land on a property pay the amount shown on the deed, split equally between the banker and the player with the Top Hat token. (If the Top Hat player is also the banker, that player receives the full amount.)


If your token is the Top Hat, do nothing.

Otherwise, if you land here you have two options: You may estimate your tax at $200 and pay the Bank, or you may pay 10% of your total worth to the Bank. Your total worth is all your cash on hand, printed prices of mortgaged and unmortgaged properties and cost price of all buildings you own.

A player may choose to have another player determine his or her income tax liability, for a consideration of 10% of the total liability.

You must decide which option you will take before you add up your total worth.




You land in Jail when…
  1. Your token lands on the space marked “Go to Jail”,
  2. Your token is the Shoe, and you land within 4 spaces of the “Go to Jail” space,
  3. During income tax computation, another player discovers your cash hidden beneath the board,
  4. You draw a card marked “Go to Jail” or
  5. You have the Shoe token, and the player with the Top Hat token declares you should go to jail.
A player gets out of Jail by…
  1. Being the player with the Top Hat token,
  2. Using the “Get Out of Jail Free Card”
  3. Purchasing the “Get Out of Jail Free Card” from another player and playing it.
  4. Donating $50 to Gov. Chris Christie’s re-election campaign before you roll the dice on either of your next two turns. If you do not throw doubles by your third turn, you must pay the $50 fine. You then get out of Jail and immediately move forward the number of spaces shown by your throw.
Even though you are in Jail, you may buy and sell property, buy and sell houses and hotels and collect rents, arrange to have other players eliminated or collect “protection” fees from other players.


Money can be loaned to a player only by the Bank and then only by mortgaging property or in exchange for real items in the borrower’s possession ... watches, jewelry, etc. No player except the Top Hat may borrow from or lend money to another player.

If the player with the Shoe token’s net worth comes within 15% of the net worth of the player with the Top Hat token, the Top Hat player may borrow the gun from the game Clue and shoot the Shoe player.

NOTE: The player with the Top Hat token and the Banker may at any time amend these rules in whatsoever fashion they choose. If the Top Hat player is also the banker, that player may alter the rules unilaterally at any time.

RULES for a SHORT GAME (60 to 90 seconds)

Take everyone else’s money and declare yourself the winner.

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