Thursday, September 10, 2015

Apple News

It’s not too early to begin discussing the round of new products to be unveiled at Apple’s next media circus event. Apart from a new set of incrementally improved iPhones, iPads, iPods and Macs, the world’s attention is likely to focus on the revolutionary new Apple Thumbtack!1

The Apple Thumbtack, as you might imagine, is designed to join multiple documents. In keeping with the new 3D pressure sensitivity, a light press of the Apple Thumbtack creates a document collection. A heavier press creates a merged document containing the combined contents of all the individual documents. And the heaviest press creates a hole in your screen.

Apple may take some flack for this reversal of Steve Jobs’ well known view that “if you have to use a thumbtack, they blew it.” Still, it’s been acknowledged the thumbtack has been on Apple’s Chair, Art Levinson’s mind for a while.

1Our sources inform us that Apple Paperclip was rejected as being too similar to Microsoft’s Office Assistant, and Apple Staple just sounded stupid.

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