Blogma

A recent New York Times article warned that computers are rapidly taking over higher and higher level jobs as their software becomes capable of performing more tasks that used to require human intelligence and judgment. Computers are now comparable to humans at recognizing faces, emotions and attitudes, allowing them to screen passengers at airports, interview applicants for important jobs, or psychoanalyze pathological criminals.

In order to stay ahead of the curve, The Tech Curmudgeon has dismissed most of its writing staff, and will be running blog posts written by software, beginning with the following:

This is a blog post. The word blog is a contraction of web log, initially denoting a form of on-line journal. While many blogs exist to inform or facilitate information exchange, this blog has the purpose of entertaining. Therefore, each post will employ several forms of humor, including:

non sequitur

the abrupt diversion of a line of reasoning to pineapple.

hyperbole

the use of exaggeration to provoke uncontrollable paroxysms of gasp-inducing laughter.

incongruity

when stuff, like, doesn’t go together.

double entendre

the erection of a member potent in multiple openings.

non sequitur again

also known as repetition.

These figures shall be employed in roughly equal proportions, occasionally interspersed with other comedic devices, such as referring to important political figures as doody heads. The purpose of this is to induce a momentary sense of surprise or disorientation to which humans are apt to react by rapid expulsions of air accompanied by vocalizations.

We hope you like it.